Thoughts with a side of headache

Okay, this is my second and will probably be my last post from Omaha. For those of you with a vested interest in my well-being,
I am actually having a most excellent time here, even though,
as I remembered, there is not a whole lot of stuff to do, and
even less if you are broke as we all seem to be. But at any rate, this trip has been really good especially because for once in my life I am finding myself able to live in the moment, which in
turn helps me to be content and happy with my surroundings.
I don't know how I have managed to do that, which means I don't know how I'll be able to repeat the attitude. As far as
Australia is concerned I am feeling rather nervous and freaked
out, as well as excited. I think I am feeling certain that by
the time I leave, I will not be "ready" to go, whatever "ready" means. Perhaps it is just better for me to be unready, to just plunge in like it's the deep end of a chilly swimming pool.
But, being the control freak that I am, in my perfect world I
would have somehow known some mystical technique of self-preparation and would have completed all of the necessary tasks
far before this point, launching me into personal inner tranquility. One of the things I learned in my cultural
transition class was that things go a lot more smoothly when expectations are set aside. But I feel like I don't know what
to expect, or what to think, or even if I'm coming or going most
of the time. Well, my little self, get comfortable in your confusion. I think it's going to stick around for awhile.